Patterns of Intellectual Bullies

This post is in response to, specifically this part:

When people put “design patterns” on their resume, I like to ask them a particular question — especially when their background is J2EE or they say they know design patterns. The question I like to ask is define design patterns — what does that term mean? I’d say about 90% of the people who put that on their resume bomb that question. It’s actually not an easy question. As soon as they answer it — they give me some sort of pseudo-book definition — I tear into them. I’ll give you an example:

The typical thing that they’ll say is, “Oh! A design pattern is this code thing that solves…umm…a problem.”

And I’ll go, “Well, shit.” laughter “Quicksort, right? That must be a fucking design pattern then.” laughter

And then they’ll say, “Well no. Quicksort isn’t a design pattern.”

Then I’m like, “Well, explain to me how it isn’t a design pattern. Your definition is that is solves a problem — which I agree, design patterns do solve a problem — but obviously that’s not a sufficient definition for design patterns.”

You get where I’m coming from? And the reason isn’t…

And then they’ll say something like, “Well, you know. It doesn’t have like… It’s not an algorithm!”

“Umm…Yeah. So then design problems are something that solves a problem but isn’t an algorithm. So, code versioning! The practice of code versioning solves a problem and it’s not an algorithm clearly! (In fact this is what’s called a “best practice.”) So how is a best practice not a design pattern?”

See no matter what they do they fall in a fucking trap. laughter

So I’ll give you my definition of design patterns. Well my honest-to-goodness definition of design patterns is to quote a famous Supreme Court justice when he was talking about it: He said that he’ll know it when he sees it.

Actually, he was talking about porn. laughter But there is pretty much no difference between design patterns and porn so we are all okay with that.

For Terry to say “design patterns are like porn, you know it when you see it” is funny and entertaining, but careless and unhelpful.

When a web developer talks about design patterns, it seems likely he means patterns of the type described by Martin Fowler in “Patterns of Enterprise Application Architecture”. Regarding the definition of patterns, Fowler has this to say on page 9:

There’s no generally accepted definition of a pattern, but perhaps the best place to start is Christopher Alexander … “Each pattern describes a problem which occurs over and over again in out environment, and then describes the core of the solution to that problem, in such a way that you can use this soution a miillion times over, without ever doing it the same way twice.”

Fowler then goes on for several paragraphs refining and explaining the concept. So while nobody has a rigourous definition of “design patterns”, there does appear to be a rough outline of how to discover them, and then to agree on instances of patterns by naming and describing them. (Whereas the definition of porn cannot ever be agreed on, becuase it is in the eye of the beholder. I’d prefer not to take the analogy much further. 😉

Patterns as Domain-Specific Vocabulary

Fowler (page 11) says “… the value of the pattern is not that it gives you a new idea; the value lies in helping you communicate your idea.” That is, patterns are a common vocabulary to aid communication. Application design patterns are a vocabulary to aid communication about application design.

There are many kinds of patterns in the software world. To use Terry’s examples, quicksort could easily be called a pattern of some kind, perhaps a sorting pattern. Code versioning could also be called a pattern of some kind, perhaps an organizing pattern. Best practices might be patterns of management. But they’re not application design patterns.

Intellectual Bullying

As the interviewer, Terry does not appear to be seeking to tease out what the applicant thinks he means when he says “design patterns”. Terry uses the term “design patterns” in a generic way, instead of in the way the applicant most likely intends — “application design patterns”. It sounds like Terry is attempting to trap the interviewee by subtly and purposely misleading him.

I have to wonder if that kind of questioning technique is appropriate behavior for someone in a position of power (and the interviewer does have a measure of power over the applicant). It sounds like an intentionally negative experience, one that is unnecessarily humiliating.

In fact, it sounds like bullying; intellectual bullying, to be sure, but bullying nonetheless. It reminds me of passages from the chapter on “Homo Logicus” in Alan Cooper’s “The Inmates Are Running The Asylum”. Cooper (101-104) compares and contrasts the physical/athletic jock and the mental/intellectual jock, both of whom exhibit immature bullying behavior.

The athlete bully, with great physical prowess, begins with the idea that “If I can beat you in a physical contest, then I am your master and I am better than you,” but eventually is conditioned to accept that physical domination is not socially acceptable. He grows up when he realizes he can’t get along with other adults by bullying them.

The intellectual bully, with great mental prowess, begins with the idea that “If I can beat you in a mental contest, then I am your master and I am better than you.” However, the intellectual bully rarely learns that mental domination is similarly unacceptable in civil, adult discourse. “There is no maturation process to temper their exercise of that power.” (Cooper, 104)

Closing Thought

When in a competition, physical or mental, try to win! But civil discourse is not competitive; you don’t “win” a conversation. Mature adults attempt to work with each other to clarify meaning; they are both truthful and helpful when speaking to each other. They try to “find out what is right.” Bullies and the immature, on the other hand, want to “be right” period, even if (maybe even because) that means knocking the other person around. Beware the mental bully in yourself, and point it out when you see it in others.

Escape from Namespaces

I admit that I am an unproductive whiner on this issue. I don’t care if namespaces go into PHP or not; at this point, I’d almost rather they not. But some of my feelings as expressed on IM this morning:

09:13:08  pmjones: yayfornewnamespaceseparator
09:13:12  pmjones: hmmmm
09:13:19  nate: oh geez
09:13:27  nate: I can't believe they picked *that* one
09:13:33  pmjones: does that mean there are two newlines in that phrase?
09:13:36  pmjones: who knows.
09:13:53  nate: you should really post something like that
09:14:01  pmjones: maybe PHP really *is* getting bought by Microsoft
09:14:12  nate: yeah
09:14:17  nate: you'd have at least thought they'd go with /
09:14:31  pmjones: no, that's division
09:14:38  pmjones: which might make sense, now that i think about it
09:14:47  pmjones: for all the divisiveness we have over it
09:14:51  nate: heh ;-)
09:14:59  nate: you took the words out of my mouth
09:15:03  nate: er, fingers
09:15:06  pmjones: indeed
09:15:16  pmjones: i know you want namespaces very badly ...
09:15:23  pmjones: ... but do you want them *this* badly?
09:15:45  nate: still undecided
09:16:00  pmjones: if you want them badly, badly is what you've got ;-)

To explain the jokes:

The “n” characters in the namespace string are escaped newlines; thus, “yayfornewnamespaceseparator” might well be translated as “yayfor[newline]ew[newline]amespaceseparator”. ASCII gurus will know what f and s translate to.

Zend Is Not PHP, so Microsoft can’t buy “PHP”. But the backslashes are very DOS-ish.

Here ends the unproductive whining, at least for now.

Labor Day Benchmarks

By popular request, here is an update of my web framework benchmarks report. You can see previous result sets here:

Before you comment on this post, please have the courtesy to read at least the first two articles above; I am tired of refuting the same old invalid arguments about “hello world makes no sense”, “if you cache, it goes faster”, “the ORM systems are different”, and “speed isn’t everything” with people who have no understanding of what these reports actually say.

Full disclosure: I am the lead developer on the Solar Framework for PHP 5, and I was an original contributor to the Zend framework.

In the interest of putting to rest any accusations of bias or favoritism, the entire project codebase is available for public review and criticism here.

Flattered By Imitators

They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. As such, I am sincerely flattered that the following articles and authors have adopted methodologies strikingly similar to the methodology I outlined in Nov 2006.

  • SellersRank here and here.
  • AVNet Labs here.
  • Rasmus Lerdorf here. I am considering writing a separate post about this talk by Rasmus.

Methodology, Setup, and Source Code

The methodology in this report is nearly identical to that in previous reports. I won’t duplicate that narrative here; please see this page for the full methodology.

The only difference from previous reports regards the server setup. Although I’m still using an Amazon EC2 instance, I now provide the full setup instructions so you can replicate the server setup as well as the framework setup. See this page for server setup instructions.

Finally, you can see all the code used for the benchmarking here.

Results, Part 1

Update: FYI, opcode caching is turned on for these results.

The “avg” column is the number of requests/second the framework itself can deliver, with no application code, averaged over 5 one-minute runs with 10 concurrent users. That is, the framework dispatch cycle of “boostrap, front controller, page controller, action method, view” will never go any faster than this.

The “rel” column is a percentage relative to PHP itself. Thus, if you see “0.1000” that means the framework delivers 10% of the maximum requests/second that PHP itself can deliver.

framework avg rel
baseline-html 2309.14 1.7487
baseline-php 1320.47 1.0000
cake-1.1.19 118.30 0.0896
cake-1.2.0-rc2 46.42 0.0352
solar-1.0.0alpha1 154.29 0.1168
symfony-1.0.17 67.35 0.0510
symfony-1.1.0 67.41 0.0511
zend-1.0.1 112.36 0.0851
zend-1.5.2 86.23 0.0653
zend-1.6.0-rc1 77.85 0.0590

We see that the Apache server can deliver 2300 static “hello world” requests/second. If you use PHP to echo "Hello World!" you get 1300 requests/second; that is the best PHP will get on this particular server setup.

Cake: After conferring with the Cake lead developers, it looks like the 1.2 release has some serious performance issues (more than 50% drop in responsiveness from the 1.1 release line). They are aware of this and are fixing the bugs for a 1.2.0-rc3 release.

Solar: The 1.0.0-alpha1 release is almost a year old, and while the unreleased Subversion code is in production use, I make it a point not to benchmark unreleased code. I might do a followup report just on Solar to show the decline in responsiveness as features have been added.

Symfony: Symfony remains the least-responsive of the tested frameworks (aside from the known-buggy Cake 1.2.0-rc1 release). No matter what they may say about Symfony being “fast at its core”, it does not appear to be true, at least not in comparison to the other frameworks here. But to their credit, they are not losing performance. (Could it be there’s not much left to lose? 😉 In addition, I continue to find Symfony to be the hardest to set up for these reports — more than half my setup time was spent on Symfony alone.

Zend: The difference between the 1.0 release and the 1.5 release is quite dramatic: a 25% drop in responsiveness. And then another 10% drop between 1.5 and 1.6.

To sum up, my point from earlier posts that “every additional line of code will reduce responsiveness” is illustrated here. Each of the newer framework releases has added features, and has slowed down as a result. This is neither good nor bad in itself; it is an engineering and economic tradeoff.

Results, Part 2

I have stated before that I don’t think it’s fair to compare CodeIgniter and Prado to Cake, Solar, Symfony, and Zend, because they are (in my opinion) not of the same class. Prado especially is entirely unlike the others.

Even so, I keep getting requests to benchmark them, so here are the results; the testing conditions are idential to those from the main benchmarking.

framework avg rel
baseline-html 2318.89 1.7710
baseline-php 1309.39 1.0000
ci-1.5.4 229.29 0.1751
ci-1.6.2 189.89 0.1450
prado-3.1.0 39.86 0.0304

CodeIgniter: Even the CI folks are not immune to the rule that “there is no such thing as a free feature”; between 1.5.4 and 1.6.2 releases they lost about 18% of their requests/second. However, they are still running at 14.5% of PHP’s maximum, compared with the 11.68% of Solar-1.0.0-alpha1 (the most-responsive of the frameworks benchmarked above), so it’s clearly the fastest of the bunch.

Prado: Prado works in a completely different way than the other frameworks listed here. Even though it is the slowest of the bunch, it’s simply not fair to compare it in terms of requests/second. If the Prado way of working is what you need, then the requests/second comparison will be of little value to you.

This Might Be The Last Time

Although I get regular requests to update these benchmark reports, it’s very time-consuming and tedious. It took five days to prepare everything, add new framework releases, make the benchmark runs, do additional research, and then write this report. As such, I don’t know when (if ever) I will perform public comparative benchmarks again; my thanks to everyone who provided encouragement, appreciation, and positive feedback.

Solar System

In the spirit of some other framework projects, the Solar Framework for PHP 5 now offers a ready-to-use Solar system to get new users off to a quick start. It’s not prepared as a tarball just yet, but it is available for checkout or export using Subversion from

For example, if you make a checkout in your document root …

$ cd /var/www/html
$ svn checkout solar

… and follow the README instructions, you will have a fully-operational installation in very short order, including an SQLite database, authentication, and three example applications:
A simple “hello world”
A complex “hello world” with authentication and localization
A “bookmarks” application.

(Note that the “index.php” is only in the evaluation deployment; when you create a virtual host and point it at the Solar system document root, a .htaccess file makes the “index.php” unnecessary.)

You can read more about the structure and principles of the Solar system here.


Several developers have asked me what “BREAD” means in web applications. Most everyone knows that CRUD is “create, read, update, delete,” but I think that misses an important aspect of web apps: the listing of records to select from.

I don’t recall where I first heard the term BREAD; it stands for “browse, read, edit, add, delete”. That covers more of what common web apps do, including the record listings. It even sounds nicer: “crud” is something icky, but “bread” is warm and fulfilling. That’s why I tend to use the term BREAD instead of CRUD, especially when it comes to Solar and action-method names in the application logic.

Update 1 (2008-08-21): Wow, lot of traffic from Reddit and Y-Combinator on this one. Be sure to check out my post on Web Framework Benchmarking, and of course the Solar Framework for PHP 5.

I see a couple of comments saying that “browse is the same thing as read, it’s just a special-case of read.” I can see where that would be true, in a limited way. Using similar logic, one could argue that “add” is a special case of “edit”, it just happens that the record isn’t there yet; and then “delete” is another special case of “edit”, you’re just editing it out of existence. So that leaves you with just Read (one/many) and Edit (existing/non-existing/out-of-existence).

I think that takes things way too far. 😉 The special cases of “edit” are *so* special that they deserve their own logic. I think the same thing applies to “browse” — it might be a special case of “read”, but it’s different-enough to deserve its own place.

Update 2: Matthew Weier O’Phinney refreshes my memory — he mentioned the term to me years ago in a discussion about his PHP port of CGI::App. Thanks, Matthew!

Update 3: I said above that you could reduce all operations to “read” (with 2 cases) and “edit” (with 3 cases). It occurs to me now that those correspond to the way GET and POST are most-widely used. So maybe it wasn’t such a silly argument after all. 😉